Getting Back on Track: 6 Things to Do When You Feel Like You've Been Dumped

I believe you’ll agree with me when I say that:

Getting dumpedis one of the most painful feelings in this world filled with arrays of emotions, if not the most frustrating one.

What will grind your gear even more is if the dumping happened atan infuriating avenue – social media, text message, IM, or even in email.

As per Cosmopolitan, women who were dumped electronically accounts for 27%, while 16% are victimized by men who left them in cold air.

Contrastingly, 80% of men suppose that breakups should be personal, that it should be a face-to-face endeavor. Roughly 4% of gents consider online and electronic breakups as acceptable.

Meanwhile, founding no chemistry is the greatest determinant why females dump men (18% of the time) according to Men’s Health. On most occasions (54% of the time), they ruminate the idea for weeks before actually doing it.

Is it dumping when you’re not official?

People have varying opinions, but I believe that it is.

It’s true that while you’re still on the dating stage, you haven’t consented yet to be someone’s partner. You’re still figuring things out, and testing the waters of each other.

But is being emotionally invested not a sufficient ground to be rightfully hurt when you get dumped?

Some wouldn’t buy my proposition, but we’re just individuals who yearn for love.

If he/she gave you special treatment and made you feelprecious, then you have every right in the world to be hurt.

The following are six ways to care for your wrenched heart after a painful dumping:

Take it from someone who just casually breezed through social media accounts only to end up staring at the ex’s photograph with the new partner.

#1: Realize the situation but don’t fall victim to self-pity

Here’s what happens on most occasions: you loved, you felt a connection, somehow you were treated unfairly or denied a chance to prove yourself, you were dumped.

The key is take it all in, all the positives and negatives. By realizing the truth, you let yourself be pained, healed, and comforted afterwards.

But here are statements you should never tell yourself:

“It’s over for me. I can’t find anyone better than him/her.”

“No one else will be love me again.”

“I’m bound to be desolated forever.”

It’s okay to admit that you feel great sorrow because you were dumped. It’s natural. It’s also fine to digest the fact that you have somehow been played for fool or treated unfairly.

But to punish yourself with unwarranted assumptions will just compound your misery. Be realistic, it’s foolish to think that it’s all over for you.

#2: Allow yourself to mourn for your spoiled relationship

“Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted,” that’sa mourning advice originally tailored for death grievers by the apostle Matthew.

That adage serves the purpose of breakups too, particularly those who’re dumped.

Why?

It’s because you lost not only the future vision of a relationship and the bond with the personitself, but also an emotional investment you’ve protected and nurtured for so long.

After accepting the truth, it’s time to get real. Cry when you can’t hold back the tears. By experiencing pain, you let yourself know that the breakup is real, as opposed to people who suppress their emotions only to find themselves stuck and unable to move on from the relationship months after.

Another trick is to allow yourself to be pained for a certain amount of time (e.g., three days, one week, or a month). You’ll surely feel lighter and relieved afterwards.

#3: Remind yourself that you deserve the kind of love you’re giving

Even before getting dumped, you can easily recognize if he/she’s worth your love (only if you’re extremely frank and truthful about it). Chances are you were already given telltale signs that the person’s not a keeper, but youignored it.

Not to plant hatred or anything, but if a person doesn’t want you in his/her life, that’s one great blessing that you got dumped.

You deserve to be reciprocated.

#4: Rewire old ties

You were so happy back then that you had no time for your four-legged friend, orfor attending mini reunions with college peers.

People and thingsyou had to abandon were your happiness constants, but you somehow forfeited it for something you thought would last a lifetime.

But it isn’t too late! It’s actually the most ideal time to declutter your head by rekindling those ties.

Invite friends over for your traditional slumber party. Take the time to treat your parents out for coffee.Be with your sister when she decides to window shop.

Didn’t have the time to find your true passion? Maybe it’s time to fulfill your T-shirt printing business. Renew your gym membership or TV subscription.

Whatever it is, make sure it somehow lets you forgetwhat happened. Guarantee that it gives you new beginnings.

#5: Appreciate the favor your ex gave you

You mean the backstabbing, lying, and unfair nature of that person? No. It’s the opportunity of freeing you so you can find your true soulmate.

It’s pretty understandable. We hate it when we wasted our time, resources, and energy on a failed endeavor.

But the chance that person gave for you to find that person who truly relishes your presence is the best gift an ex can give you. The sooner they left you off the hook, the better it is for you. No more white lies and pretentions.

#6: Rise from the adversity

Every downfall imparts us something, and it’s the same with getting dumped. You’re finally unshackled and a step closer to finding your worthy life partner.

Instead of plotting revenge, do things that are more beneficial for yourself.

You know better now. You had a glimpse of how cheaters operate silently, and you can’t be fooled that easy now.

You’ll also realize that you shouldn’t never settle for a mediocre type of love. Convince yourself that you’re worthy of every ounce of love and affection you can squeeze out from a person.

Strive for improvement. They can’t dump a gold nugget next time.

Are you still grieving? It’s a human thing.

Do you feel sorry for times you feel you’ve wasted?It’s natural.

When your emotional wounds have finally mended, you’ll bounce back harder in both life and romance.

Author Bio

Wade is an essayist at wedoessay.com He incorporates nature’s beauty in his writing. Besides excellence, he puts his lovely wife and two kids at the center of his craft. He is fond of physical contact sports and considers South America as a haven for tourists.